The Loose Association of Wargamers

Do your worst!
I spend Festag at temple like a good little Sigmarite.
(Although given the choice I tend towards characters who favour the sign of the crossed fingers.)

That's quite realistic. My body guard in Peru told me that about a third of people pulling out a handgun in action for the first time discharge it in the holster, frequently with unpleasant results.

And I’m just supposed to leave that unremarked with all it’s smutty euphemism potential?

He didn't mention that, it was mainly toes and thighs, some more serious stuff with shoulder holsters.

Oh yeah, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure it was a, perfectly respectable conversation about having a premature discharge down your thigh.

You have those all the time in Latin America, even at my age. It is polite when noticing to look around and get yer own eyeful of the cause.

I'd love to have done this but the only way I think it would work for me is to travel up to LTs and steal his internet

Border Reiving for the 21st Century !

In a situation like that, I’d let the unable-to-make-it player control a significant NPC: leader of the local outlaw gang, say.
He gets to make ‘policy decisions’ (“this week the outlaws will be watching the river for cargo barges”)
and decide their attitude to the PCs.
(“We’ll tax them if they try to cross the pass, help out with bowshots from the treeline if we see them fighting the Count’s men, otherwise let them get on with it.”)
Something you could do by PM or email.

Would "Kill them...…...Kill them all" be seen as an extreme policy decision?