Wargames Shame Confession Booth

[Peeler]

When I was a young boy, me and my chum wargamed with unpainted Airfix figures, glued to thin card from a Kellogs box, in Btns of 16 figures on four bases. We used Napoleonic, AWI, US Cavalry and Confederates all together, with some odd Featherstonian type rules which we didn't really understand.

[Jeremy]

I remember basing 1/72nd plastics to cereal card 30 odd years ago (when Peeler was in his 70’s). The bastards warped and I had to rebase them.

[grizzlymc]

Too much glue, you had to have just a smidgin.

[valleyboy]

Cheating - ignoring unfavourable dice rolls when playing solo games because the side I wanted to win didn't get the roll I wanted and re rolling them (sometimes going for the best out of 3, no 5 etc until my favoured side won the melee)

Counting a dice if it falls on the floor in a solo game if its a 6 but re rolling it if its a 1 or something

I only cheat when I play solo though
I don't have to try that hard to beat anyone else though
i'm a dead ard wargamer I am (on the rare occasion that I wargame)

[Penda]

I just do not think any of the rules by Two Fat Lardies are any good, sorry, but there you are.

[grizzlymc]

Using Airfix 20th c houses in Wellingtonics games
Using a brigade of 3 regiments of Scots Greys
Fighting waterloo with an Airfix La Haye saint in the middle of the table and a to scale Hougomont on the right flank.
Mixing up my airfix Wellingtonics and civil war stuff
Fighting chieftans versus leopards
Using ROCO minitanks with Airfix forces
I have never built a model plane without fogging up the transparent bits with polystyrene cement

[RMD]

I just do not think any of the rules by Two Fat Lardies are any good, sorry, but there you are.

Amen, brother...

[RMD]

I once played a Wellingtonics game without a meticulously-researched order of battle and map.

There. I've said it,

It feels so dirty, but it feels so good.

[grizzlymc]

I think most consenting Wellingtonics wargamers have done that at some time in the past. There is no need to feel dirty, although it might be wise not to mention it in public.

I have been known to just shove a division with supporting arms into each player's hands and then make up the scenery.

[Tim Hall]

I can't say I'm particularly ashamed of any of the following, but it might be cathartic..................

I played a lot of large battle fantasy and really enjoyed it, no silly armies like Chaos, undead etc, just good old Humans, Dwarves, Elves and Orcs with some monsters and very limited magic and silliness.

I like "get every figure you have that might be suitable" on the table and give it a go games, hence the last stand of the Varangian Guard against an Orc horde and similar events.

I found I was getting bored quite easily in large wargames, which is partly why I moved to Toy Soldier games. I have no patience for wargamey pseuds. I also find wargamers in a herd unpalatable and extremely smelly, which is why I am not bothered about wargame shows anymore.

I am incredibly arrogant and intolerant, sorry folks for any past or future misdemeanours.

Totally not bothered about whatever the latest/new/shiny thing is in the hobby, or arguments over which set of rules is better than another (I don't like the majority of them).

I agree that Donald Featherstone did put the hobby "on the map" but his rules are frankly, utter rubbish, have bits missing or are just plain wrong. The skirmish Wargames book is a good example, granted they were not his rules, he couldn't even transcribe them properly, loads of gaps and errors. But a useful book for ideas.

Most military history books are a cure for insomnia, rarely well written, and yes Anthony Beevor I'm looking at you, and only good for reference, and then maybe.

Finally I bear grudges, particularly if I feel wronged, so no redemption for Jon Sutherland, John Ray or Tony Hawkins, an axis of arseholes.

Yep, that was indeed cathartic.