Loose Ass Crackers

[Purple]

There is serious Punners on here... SO
Time for an annual Loose Ass Christmas Cracker joke thread!

So far I have..l

‘What’s Count Bel’s favourite film?’
The shining!

And

‘Why doesn’t Goat Major attend fancy Christmas Parties?’
Because he Dreadballs.

[Jeremy]

And Purps favorite movie phrase...

There can be only One!

[garyp]

EB's favourite song?

Road to nowhere!

Peeler's?

Blowin' in the wind.

[Essex Boy]

I'm going to give Purps such a slap when I next see him.

[Peeler]

I popped a cracker out of my ass when the wife woke me up with tea this morning. It made her rather tearful.

[Purple]

Was it Jacobs?

[Jeremy]

I'm going to give Purps such a slap when I next see him.

Purps might get the wrong idea. That’s his version of fourplay

[valleyboy]

I popped a cracker out of my ass when the wife woke me up with tea this morning. It made her rather tearful.

And that's Peelers version of foreplay

[Peeler]

No, I wasn't sat on her face when I popped one out.