The last of the civilians for Ayton next week.

Alice Shuttlecock-Jones, Chairwoman of the WA, amateur nudist and collector of vintage phalluses. Alice has always dreamed of disrobing in Ayton Hall over a bank holiday weekend. By a bizarre coincidence, her great grandson, 8 decades later, will make a model of that very hall, for use in a game of toy soldiers. Next to her are Four-finger Pete and Farmer Jack. Woe betide any who trespass on their allotment.

More kindling for Vegan flamethrowers